I walk down the street muttering, "Glory be, the funk's on me." The question is not whether Nike's "Roswell Rayguns" faux-1970s campaign starring a fur-draped Vince Carter is the most clever commercial series of the year; the question is when the company will send me a Rayguns uniform, which would surely displace the Wes Unseld No. 41 Bullets retro as the hottest jersey on the street.
Sticking with commercials, if you haven't seen the Keith Jackson-narrated Gatorade ad featuring grainy classic footage of Steve Spurrier-era Florida football, you're missing the advertising equivalent of ESPN Classic. What does it mean? "Retro" is the watchword for the summer.
So now that you've got the scoop on one thing that's totally passé, take a look at the rest of what's hot and what's not this week. Feel free to share with your co-workers, buddies and significant others -- they will really appreciate you for it:
What's Hot, What's Not this week
|
Category |
Hot |
Not |
Controversy |
Uncloseting athletes |
Kobe's food poisoning |
Giambi brother in a new uni |
Jeremy |
Jason |
NFL training camp gimmick |
Straight-on kickers (Pittsburgh) |
Come in without a contract (Patrick Ramsey in DC) |
NBA draft intrigue |
Clippers at 8, 12 spots |
What will Houston do? |
Cubs savior |
An unscathed Mark Prior |
A healthy Kerry Wood |
Matt Hasselbeck's nightmare |
Ryan Leaf |
Trent Dilfer |
NBA draft sleeper PG |
Florida exile Teddy Dupay |
Fresno exile Tito Maddox |
Reffing issue |
Foul counts |
Last-second shots |
Early World Cup bandwagon team |
Cameroon |
Costa Rica |
Postgame press conference look |
Shaq's white bucket hat |
Kobe's white Yankees hat |
Brian Billick's cause |
Players should dump their agents |
Players should mug for HBO cameras |
Playoff madness |
NHL OT |
NBA road teams winning |
NFL contract dispute |
Rich Gannon |
Joe Horn |
MLB division |
NL West |
AL Central |
New Orleans NBA franchise nickname |
The Jazz (make a trade with Utah) |
The Hornets |
Football-analyst Cris |
Carter |
Collinsworth |
Mr. Excitement |
Bobby Jackson |
Keith Van Horn |
Brady Anderson statement |
Thumb sticking out on highway |
Sideburns sticking out from hat |
Vikings relocation conventional wisdom |
Red McCombs' L.A. envy |
Red McCombs' Irsay envy |
Movie blockbuster |
"Insomnia" |
"Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron" |
Shady sports-racing industry |
Dogs |
Horses |
Netminder |
Arturs Irbe |
Curtis Joseph |
Voting block |
Office-park dads |
Soccer moms |
NBA's greatest coach ever |
Phil Jackson |
Red Auerbach |
500-HR Club member |
Frank Robinson |
Mark McGwire |
NHL clutch scorers |
Unexpected players |
Superstars |
Dan Shanoff is a columnist for Page 2. His "What's Hot, What's Not" trend-spotting list appears Thursdays. Got inside scoop on an up-and-coming trend? Want to declare something passé? Send this glimpse of your hipness to hotnotlist@yahoo.com.