(Editor's note: Oregon running back Reuben Droughns will share a weekly diary with ESPN.com throughout the season. For more information on the Ducks, visit the official Oregon site.)

Oct. 13, 1999

Going into last week's game against the Bruins, I knew it was an important weekend. I remember on the walk-through before the game, going out to the place on the field where I got hurt last year against them. I remember that gave me a little boost of confidence, even though I was still wondering what was going to happen -- if I was even going to get a shot to even play.

	Droughns averaged 7.4 yards per carry and scored nine TDs in 1998.

This game, like last year, was a big one and very emotional, but still different than our 1998 game. Both games were intense but in different ways and levels. The year before, we were on top late, and we knew we could win, while this year we had to come back and show a different intensity (the Ducks fought back from a 24-point deficit but still suffered a 34-29 loss to UCLA). We had to be more energetic and get more physical, and show we could outplay them.

Once the game got going, I started off slow. I wasn't really able to get in the flow until the start of the second half. Even if you saw me on the sideline, you would have seen a change in intensity. I was trying to get people pumped up so they could make some hits and some plays. I still think I was giving a lot of effort early, but for some reason I was still falling short.

Others have been asking if I feel like I give the team a lift when I'm on the field. I don't know. I do see myself as a very emotional player, and I like to give it my all. When my team's going to battle, I feel like I have to go with them, no matter what kind of pain I have.

	THE FULL DOSE OF DIARIES
	USC's Travis Claridge: Shooting for four
	Georgia Tech's Joe Hamilton: Leader of the pack
	Miami's André King: Putting on a good show
	UCLA's Danny Farmer: Bowl-bound Bruins?
	Oregon State's Ken Simonton: All about execution
	Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops: Busy bye week
	Ole Miss' Todd Wade: Ready for 'Bama
	Wyoming's Jarnagin, Demos: Bad loss in Laramie

As far as picking them up on the field, that's not for me to judge. If it looks like I'm working hard, which others might say, I guess they tend to appreciate that effort and maybe pick up their own. But like I said, that's not for me to judge. I have to focus on continuing to work as hard as I can and staying as healthy as I can.

People were also asking if the padding and jacket I wore had bothered me (the UCLA game marked Droughns' first game back after suffering a separated rib and torn cartilage against USC earlier this season). I don't think that can be an excuse. As a running back, no matter what you're wearing, you have to hold onto the ball. I did fumble the ball twice, and I'm sorry for that and wish I could take them back.

I did feel like I played a little slow and not up to my intensity level the first half. In the second half, running backs coach Gary Campbell kind of suggested that I take the padding and jacket off, and I said, 'Yeah, you're right,' and took it off. It was killing me before, but it felt better afterwards.

Looking ahead now, we have to continue to work hard as a team in practice and focus on executing the plays and our assignments. I'm definitely looking forward to the second half of the season and trying to get the job done. The week off comes at a great time. I can rest my ribs and my whole body, and the team can spend some time getting ready for Arizona.