Finally, friends, we have a winner. Or, at the very least, an answer for our Electoral Crisis. A two-word solution, at last, to fix the only mathematical mechanism in creation more convoluted than the NBA salary cap.

	Does David Stern, center, really want an L.A.-Philly final?

The two words are ... David Stern.

We present David J. Stern as your 43rd president of the United States.

We'd like to, anyway. It's a little late for nominations, agreed, but it's safe to say that standard parliamentary procedure isn't exactly working, is it? So why not Stern to run a country that, according to highly placed government sources, is really dragging out the recount because nobody wants either of the actual candidates.

If you think Stern couldn't handle it, think again. The American People would be pretty lucky to have a leader like Easy Dave, who is on a bit of a political hot streak. Who better, say, to broker a Middle East peace accord than the man who just got Allen Iverson in line? The stern commish who's fresh off punishing Minnesota harder than the rules allow -- for threatening the integrity of his fiefdom -- and getting an independent arbitrator to back up his ruling.

In 30-odd years of public service, through his various roles in the Association, Stern has actually tackled most of the issues. The death penalty (see: Timberwolves). Labor problems. The military (OK, just the draft). His quest to institute a minimum age for turning pro couldn't be more pro-education, and he only (luxury) taxes the rich, the league's overzealous spenders. Stern's administration has also made inroads in the gun-control arena; you almost never hear about NBA players brandishing weaponry anymore.

As for foreign policy, well, Stern already presides over one of the most internationally recognized organizations on the planet. Besides having total autonomy over 29 owners, most of whom have more money than third-world countries, the NBA is now televised in 205 nations and 42 different languages. Stern is so involved that he can even tell you the names of the broadcasters in Kazakhstan or Djibouti. One of our real-life presidential finalists can't even spell Kazakhstan.

It's reassuring to note that, if the NBA really had to let Stern go for the greater good of the free world, Russ Granik is a more-than-capable successor. Even better: When we put this admittedly far-fetched premise to New Jersey's Rod Thorn, the Nets' new hoops empressario took us seriously.

"He runs with the scions of industry, and he's very well-known in political circles," said Thorn, a top Stern aide for 15 years before rejoining the Nets. "He does business on a daily basis at the highest levels of commerce. I think David Stern would be a terrific president."

Why not? If NBC's Bob Costas can be considered the ultimate future commissioner of baseball, why not the NBA's Stern -- "The best commissioner in sport," Thorn says -- as Commander in Chief. Assuming he could handle the pay cut.

Or we can just keep waiting around for the head-spinning, four-corners electoral process to give us a winner. Maybe by next Tuesday, the two-week anniversary of the election, they'll get us a new president. Maybe, just maybe, the bureaucrats will come up with an answer before The Answer's Philadelphia 76ers lose a game.

Great Scott meets Grand Kenyon
Back to reality ...

Kenyon Martin's campaign to proceed from College Player of the Year to NBA Rookie of the Year certainly isn't getting much support from Martin's new coach. Three times already, just over a month into the season, New Jersey's Martin has been ripped in print for lackadaisical play by fellow rookie Byron Scott.

	“	It is disturbing ... you've got to keep jump-starting him to get a game out of him. ”
		— Byron Scott on Kenyon Martin

Under the hard-driving Bob Huggins at Cincinnati, Martin went from above-average high school player and freshman-year bench resident to No. 1 pick in the draft as a senior. In the pros, though, Martin might have unexpectedly found an even more demanding boss.

Scott, unlike many of his coaching peers, is not afraid to challenge any of his players publicly. He has also openly questioned the effort of Stephon Marbury, who, to his credit, responded to the criticism by scoring no fewer than 31 points in the first five games since. Starbury rang up 41 on Saturday to commemorate Patrick Ewing's return to the area.

Martin's numbers, by contrast, are considerably more modest, after an 11-for-36 (30.6 percent) start from the field through the Nets' first three games -- and a continual reliance on jump shots that appear to be out of his range. "I saw him in college, and I didn't see him taking that many outside shots," Scott said early last week. Then on Saturday, after Martin managed just two points and two rebounds in 23 foul-filled minutes in the Seattle game, Scott told reporters: "It is disturbing ... you've got to keep jump-starting him to get a game out of him."

Fact is, Martin is too talented not to break out eventually. He's a bit undersized (6-9, 230) to play power forward, but he is the rare rook who can change the game defensively. The rest will come a little easier with experience, and once Keith Van Horn returns from injury to ease the burden. "He has a hell of a defensive presence," said Scott, who sees Martin as the best shot-blocking rookie in the NBA since David Robinson in 1989.

Of greater long-term intrigue is Scott's candid approach and how that plays with new-millennium hoopsters. Scott was ridden hard himself as a Lakers rookie in 1983, pushed mercilessly by the coach (Pat Riley) and the star (Magic Johnson) after replacing Norm Nixon, and obviously shows little fear taking on a similar persona. But can today's players hack such heat, even from someone who has lots of credibility from his playing days? Very few coaches around the league would say there's much to be gained by sharing in-house scoldings with the press.

"I knew going in that I would be honest," Scott said. "They all know how I am, as far as challenging them, whether I'm talking to the media or talking to them. I'm telling them the truth as I see it. I feel comfortable and confident because I'm the first one to congratulate them when they're doing well. They know what they're getting.

"I've criticized Kenyon and I've also praised him. He's going to be a great player, there's no doubt in my mind. We've got a good rapport, and I've got a great rapport with Stephon, Kendall Gill, Johnny Newman, Keith Van Horn. I think [Martin] and I will develop into having a great relationship."

Martin, incidentally, has shrugged off all the harsh words so far, insisting that "nobody can be harder than that man [Huggins]." We'll see.

Around The League