Have you been paying any attention to Major League Baseball's latest marketing gimmick?

No, I don't mean Commissioner Bud's habit of running down the game every chance he gets; that's been going on for a long time. I'm talking about "Major League Baseball Memorable Moments."

I hate to fall back on the hoary old technique of quoting the dictionary ... but somehow I find that "hoary" and "Major League Baseball" go together like Darryl Strawberry and inspiring comebacks.

moment n. A brief period of time that is characterized by a quality, such as excellence.

That's just one of eight definitions listed in the American Heritage Dictionary, but it's the one that we would think most applicable to baseball. There's also this:

moment n. A brief indefinite interval of time.

Either way, when we think "moment," we think of a short period of time. A baseball "moment" is an image, something we've seen, or read about, that sticks in our mind. Something we wish we could have seen. By those criteria, then, how does this qualify?

2001 Barry Bonds
Hits 73 home runs to break single season record

What's the moment? Do you remember when Bonds hit No. 73? I don't. For that matter, do you remember when he hit No. 71 to set the new record? I don't remember that, either. I mean, I remember seeing it, but I don't remember any specifics. For a variety of reasons, it just wasn't that memorable of a moment.

Or how about this one?

2001 World Series
D-Backs defeat Yankees in classic World Series

I'm not sure what the "moment" is here, either. Is it Luis Gonzalez's Series-winning hit against Mariano Rivera? If so, I suppose I can see it, though a blooper through a drawn-in infield does leave something to be desired. Or is it the Series in general, including the Yankees' two walk-off home runs? If so, we're back to the "moment" issue.

My favorite is the last "moment" on the list ...

2001 Ichiro Suzuki
Wins MVP, Rookie of the Year, leads All-Star votes

Ichiro was great last year, but one of the 30 most memorable "moments"? Doesn't it strike anybody else as a little strange that Major League Baseball in its current form has existed for a century, and 10 percent of the "most memorable moments" just happen to have occurred in 2001?

If we're going to consider seasons as "moments," then what about 1906? There were great three-team pennant races in both leagues. The inclusion of Ichiro Suzuki's entire 2001 season as a "moment" is someone's cynical way of (as Commissioner Bud would say) "internationalizing the game." Here's another "moment," just as naked but in a different way ...

1971 Satchel Paige
First Negro League player inducted into Hall of Fame

A great thing, to be sure. But memorable? Do me a favor, and conduct this experiment ... Gather 100 of your favorite baseball fans in a room, and ask them in which year Satchel Paige was inducted into the Hall of Fame. I'd be shocked if five of them could nail it. Could you have, two paragraphs ago?

Another example of pandering:

1998 Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa
Both pass Maris' mark of 61 homers

Really? Do you remember where you were when Sosa hit his 62nd home run? I certainly don't, though I'm sure I did see it on TV. It simply wasn't a memorable moment, because McGwire beat him to 62 by five days. Major League Baseball included Sosa in 1998, and Paige in 1971, and Roberto Clemente's 3000th hit in 1972, because it is more worried about public relations than historical accuracy and relevancy.

According to the official information, "On July 9th at the All-Star Game in Milwaukee, the 30 most memorable moments in Major League Baseball history, as voted on by a panel of baseball writers, broadcasters, former players and historians, were revealed. These moments represent the most incredible, the most powerful and the most revered moments in baseball history."

Somebody at Major League Baseball is fond of covering their marketing decisions with the veneer of "a panel," but they really shouldn't expect any skeptical fan -- and aren't we all skeptical by now? -- to be fooled. Did a "panel" really come up with "1919 Babe Ruth: Red Sox sell Babe Ruth to the Yankees" as a "memorable moment"? Probably not. It was an important moment, certainly, but not "memorable," not something we can remember or imagine in our mind's eye.

Anyway, if you choose to vote (and help MLB make a bit of cash), you can do so just about as many times as you like. We're told that the "winning moments will be announced during a live broadcast prior to Game 4 of the World Series."

And if there's no World Series? Worry not, dear voters. The winning "moments" will instead be announced during the premier of a wonderful new TV movie, A Very Brady Halloween ("Featuring, as the ghost of Mike Brady, the ghost of Robert Reed. Sca-a-a-a-r-y!").

I've been a real sourpuss today, I know. I've not written about Commissioner Bud's shenanigans in quite a long time, in large part because people like Doug Pappas over at Baseball Prospectus are so much better at it. But I do still have great feelings of antipathy for the men at the top of Major League Baseball, which is why I've typed this particular screed.

Let me leave you with something constructive, though. Below are what I consider the 10 most memorable moments in baseball history ...

10. 1993 Joe Carter
Hits second World Series-clinching home run ever

9. 1986 Bill Buckner
Between his legs and the Curse lives on

8. 1961 Roger Maris
In '61, hits HR No. 61 to break the unbreakable record

7. 1974 Hank Aaron
Hits 715th home run to pass the Babe

6. 1998 Mark McGwire
Hits 62nd home run to break record

5. 1927 Babe Ruth
Breaks his own record with Home Run No. 60

4. 1908 Fred Merkle
Merkle doesn't touch second base, and the result is history

3. 1975 Carlton Fisk
Pudge wills homer fair to win Game 6

2. 1960 Bill Mazeroski
Homers in Game 7 to beat Yankees in bizarre World Series

1. 1951 Bobby Thomson
Hits the "Shot Heard 'round the World" against Ralph Branca

And there's the problem. The great majority of the most memorable moments -- eight of 10, by my count -- have been home runs, which makes the whole effort a bit less interesting. I don't blame MLB for wanting to make things as interesting as possible. What I do blame them for is 1) pandering to the forces of political correctness; 2) giving barely a nod to any sort of historical perspective (17 of the 30 "moments" have come since 1970); and 3) using the word "moments" when many of their moments aren't really moments at all.

In a sense, none of this really makes any difference to anyone. MasterCard paid whatever they paid to sponsor the package, so MLB makes some dough and nobody gets hurt. But I would argue that "Major League Baseball Memorable Moments" is symptomatic of something deeper. If MLB can can screw up history and if they can screw up an All-Star Game, then can we really expect them to get the important stuff right?