ESPNMAG.com - Knight in shining armor

News item: Former Indiana University president Myles Brand named NCAA prez. We got a look at his agenda.

Quintuple investigations budget for rural Texas. Put Neil Reed on the case.


	Sorry Mr. Dennehy, but your work isn't welcome at NCAA headquarters.

Retroactively declare subjects of ESPN original motion pictures in violation of NCAA extra-publicity rules.

Amend licensing code to outlaw red sweaters. Black ones, too.

Enact NCAA anti-swearing rules: Three violations = death penalty.

Double-secret probation for all loud fat guys.

Consider age limit for coaches: 61 years, 350 days sounds about right.

Throw the book at chair-tossers.