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December 06, 2001



Golfing with Darius
By Dan Patrick

I recently went out to Las Vegas with my friend Darius Rucker of Hootie and the Blowfish. We went to participate in the MTV Fairway to Heaven charity golf tournament. Tough duty, I know. But we made it work somehow.

Joining us were Will Smith, Brett Michaels of Poison, Dweezil Zappa, Tico Torres of Bon Jovi, Scott Stapp of Creed, Jane Seymour, Damon Wayans and Edwin McCain. Not only is McCain a great singer (check out his album 'Messenger'), he's also a funny guy.

McCain is a bit husky and he told me that he hates these celebrity get-togethers. His complaint: "People always see me and say, "Look! There's Meat Loaf!"

Once again, I had vanquished a golf foe through head games -- although spectacular drives, inspirational iron play and precise putting helped too.
Before the tournament, Darius and I played at the Royal Links. Since we were in Vegas, we were playing for a little money. A $20 Nassau in which you play for the front nine, back nine and the whole 18.

In the group ahead of us, interestingly enough, was the actress Charlize Theron. She is in the upcoming golf movie 'The Legend of Bagger Vance' (with Will Smith and Matt Damon). She was playing with a pro and her mom.

Well, if you have to play a slow round (five-and-half hours), you might as well have Charlize Theron playing in front of you. She had a nice swing but was not that good a player. We caught up with them at the tee fairly often. Every now and then she'd say, "Sorry -- tee-hee-hee!"

One time I hit a drive into their group. Figured it was a chance to make a little Hollywood small talk. I rode up to them and said I was sorry to have hit the ball so close to them. They smiled and said, essentially, "Where? When? Did you really"

I was able to use Miss Theron to gain the upper hand with Mr. Rucker, however. He was leading by three shots with two holes to go on the front nine. So I started pointing out to him that Charlize had to be a big Hootie fan. So she must have been watching him.

And I also let him know that, despite the fact that he was the big, sexy, gold-record-winning rock star, Charlize spoke her kittenish apologies to me, who was probably no more to her than one of those sports guys.

Darius played it cool, but I could feel his game tightening up. His self esteem and self confidence were plummeting. Once again, I had vanquished a golf foe through head games -- although spectacular drives, inspirational iron play and precise putting helped too.

Anyway, I beat Darius on the front, back and overall (86-84). Charlize shot a 140. That means I beat her too. One of those sports guys, my eye!

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Dan Patrick page: 2001 archive

Dan Patrick: 2001 Outtakes archive

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Rob Dibble: 2001 archive

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