America's hottest couple bumped the Pennsylvania miners into the corner.

What the heck was People magazine thinking when it paid $50,000 for nine pictures of Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck in a car together?

A. "That's a small price to pay for candid photos of the stars of 'The Cell' and 'Reindeer Games.' "

B. "Whatever. We'll sell the negatives to a jealous P. Diddy for $100,000 and turn a profit."

C. "Whatever. We'll sell the negatives to a jealous Matt Damon for $100,000 and turn a profit."

D. "Goshdarnit, the superimposing machine is broken again. Quick, call the photographers -- we need a real one."

E. "They'll be perfect for the cover of our 50 Most Fuel-Conscious Couples issue."

F. "Big deal. We paid $1 million for Jennifer's wedding pictures, and those were with some nobody named Cris Judd."