The Toronto Sun reported that sprint star Marion Jones and Tim Montgomery are hanging out in Toronto and working with Charlie Francis, former coach of defrocked sprint great Ben Johnson.

Other reports confirm that Jones has left coach Trevor Graham and say she is now going to be coached by Canadian Derek Hansen of Vancouver. Those reports don't explain why Toronto reporters found the two giants of sprinting at the York University track in Toronto in the company of Francis.

I can't imagine why the two left the very successful Graham. And I, like the rest of the world's reporters, don't have a clue what their relationship is, if any, with Francis.

But still, it's kind of fun imagining this as a phone call between Jones and her PR manager ...

PR: Marion, I'm getting phone calls. Some of them aren't nice.

Jones: Is this about us leaving Trevor?

PR: Yes, but a lot more. There are reporters telling me that you're up in Toronto now, working with Charlie Francis.

Jones: And?

PR: It's just that, Marion, this sort of thing offers certain public-relations challenges. For one thing, do you remember the 1988 Olympics? I know you were only 12 then, but surely you remember Ben Johnson getting busted for steroids after he broke the world record and won the gold medal in the 100?

Jones: In his book "Speed Trap," Francis says they were framed.

PR: He also admitted under oath that he had been doping Ben for something like seven years. But what actually happened is not my job, Marion. Dealing with what people THINK happened is my job. A lot of people thought it was one of the biggest scandals to ever hit the Olympics. Marion, Charlie Francis got banned from coaching for life. Of course, that means only he can't coach members of Canada's national team, but a lot of people might think it applies to people like you and Tim.

Jones: We're not Canadian.

PR: I'm not saying that. And I don't think people think that. You don't even speak Canadian. I'm just worried about the possible bad publicity of all this.

Jones: How bad could it be?

PR: Actually, this is about as bad as it gets. But that's still bad.

Jones: I remember you saying that even bad news is good publicity ...

PR: True, true. That's one of the givens in this business.

Jones: Who even remembers Charlie Francis?

PR: Only about 23 percent of general sports fans, I'm guessing. And an even smaller percentage remembers why they remember him. The rest think he writes mysteries about race horses. But that's Dick Francis.

Jones: Worst-case scenario ... what happens?

PR: Hollobaugh gets your cell phone number.

Jones: God, no!

PR: Just joking. Sorry about that ... But it could get almost as ugly. People might say that anyone who trains with Francis is liable to be a steroid user. It might hurt you on endorsements in the United States.

Jones: What about Europe and Japan?

PR: Not a problem. They don't have a lot of issues with drugs.

Jones: But I'm clean!

PR: Not a factor. We're only dealing with what people THINK, not what IS. Do you get the distinction?

Jones: So what am I supposed to do?

PR: Train. Be patient. Remember that the public has a very short memory. As long as you keep smiling at news conferences and keep kissing babies, they can forgive anything. You could have Satan as your coach and it wouldn't lose you any fans. You can be the exception that proves the rule.

Jones: Yikes! You are so cynical. Are you saying that the public doesn't care about drugs?

PR: We're Americans. We're obsessed with drugs. We can justify anything from Ritalin to Viagra. We don't think athletes should take drugs, but we still like the athletes. The main thing is, we don't want people to tell us that some athletes take drugs. It's like finding out the secrets behind the special effects in our favorite movies.

Jones: I hate those shows.

PR: We all do. And it's because we need magic in our lives. We need public relations. Now, more than ever.

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