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All-Stars! Champions! Hall of Famers! And ... Tom Tolbert? How did things go so terribly wrong?
No, I'm not speaking about the outrageous behavior that has smeared our wonderful game. (By the way, why is it that some people think so vehemently that the refs care who win these games? If more players cared as much themselves, we would all be a lot better off.)
After the All-Star reserves were announced, I felt as if my computer-like mind had been attacked by a virus. How could people be so misguided and mean-spirited?
Coaches preach winning, sacrifice, the team game and all that stuff and then reward the wrong things with these selections. Unconscionable. What side of their faces are they speaking out of today?
|  | | An All-Star is born in Phoenix's Amare Stoudemire, but his bright future must've blinded West coaches from getting their vote. |
How can Amare Stoudemire be left off the BIG team? He's the reason the Suns are even having a season in Arizona. Weren't Stephon Marbury and Shawn Marion on board last year as they led the Suns down the ruinous road to oblivion?
Scottie Pippen has single-handedly made the Blazers the hottest team in the league. At least David Stern had the chance to name him as the replacement for Chris Webber. Michael Finley, Richard Jefferson, Ron Artest and Jerry Stackhouse belong in Atlanta for this Sunday's All-Star Game as well.
I love the irony of Indiana's Isiah Thomas coaching MJ in his majesty's last All-Star Game. Wasn't it Michael's first All-Star Game in Indianapolis in 1985 where Isiah purportedly led the Jordan freeze out? How much playing time will coach Thomas dole out?
If Doug Collins could step aside and allow John Havlicek to start in the '78 All-Star Game, why can't Vince Carter do the same for Michael Jordan as the ultimate sign of respect? At least Doug actually played that year and deserved to be on the team.
With Tracy McGrady's uncalled-for magnanimity in the face of Carter's inexplicable selfishness, once again Tracy outshines his older cousin.
I would like to see George Karl coach Artest. Imagine the exchanges. Better yet, let's throw Tolbert into the mix as well.
Sad to see that Karl Malone won't make this year's big game in Atlanta. But at least he'll be able to participate in the Delta Center's monster truck rally that weekend with his "Power Forward."
Who's on a hotter streak right now? Tim Duncan in the NBA or actor Colin Farrell with Demi Moore, Playmate Nicole Narain, model Josie Marin and Britney Spears. Who would you rather be? Aahhhh! Life's most difficult questions.
I heard that Renee Zellweger has to gain 20 pounds for the new Bridget Jones Sequel. I suggest a quick call to Tractor Traylor for advice.
I know Rasheed Wallace has had some unexpected free time lately. During his suspension, do you think he was consulted for the upcoming Adam Sandler/Jack Nicholson film, "Anger Management"?
Given Portland's record during his suspension, Wallace's misdeeds have pushed him near the top as one of the NBA's leading MVP candidates.
With my calendar already booked through the end of June with the NBA Finals and the draft, I was so relieved to hear that the Justin Timberlake/Christine Aguilera Tour will not hit the road until the summer.
Last week, an ill Nuggets player, Rodney White, puked on the MSG floor during the game against the Knicks. It took TEN MINUTES to mop up the mess. If only New York's salary cap problems were as easy to clean.
With 5-foot-5 Earl Boykins leading Golden State to respectability, we should all heed Hall of Famer Calvin Murphy's sage wisdom: Judge him on his talent and game and not on his size. It's not how big you are but how big you play. Earl is a giant among his peers.
|  | | A rejuvenated Shawn Bradley, right, is singing a different tune these days. |
Pearl Jam is back out on tour, rolling through Dallas soon. Hopefully, Eddie Vedder will call Shawn Bradley on stage for a rockin' version of "Alive."
A former Sonics assistant coach is suing Vin Baker for abandonment on charges that Vin didn't follow through on some cash owed for a contract. How long before Celtic fans demand that this suit become a class action?
What is the better rivalry these days -- Lakers/Kings or Ron Artest/Pat Riley? Which one would you rather watch?
Heard the new "Gong Show" is in the running to become the Clippers' lead sponsor next season.
With only 82 games in the regular season, can't NBA players and their respective fiancées or wives plan on summer babies instead of during the season? By the way, congratulations, Tracy.
Knicks ticket prices don't seem so expensive after hearing what Carmen Electra and her Pussycat Doll friends are charging for their half-hour show in New York City.
If the 2002 NBA Draft were held today, would Carlos Boozer be selected ahead of his Duke teammates Jay Williams and Mike Dunleavy?
Do you think they may be drinking a bit too much coffee in Seattle these days? Gary Payton calling a team meeting? Nate McMillan losing his cool?
Do the Nuggets receive additional Ping-Pong balls since Marcus Camby re-injured himself 17 seconds into his debut game?
Do you think Sheryl Crow has any extra "War is not the answer" T-shirts for George Bush, Ron Artest, Rasheed Wallace and Jerry Sloan? Never forget that violence is the acknowledgement of failure.
Congratulations to Charles Oakley on surpassing the career 40,000-minute club. That admirable milestone is still 5,000 shy of his total number of Knicks and Bulls insults.
Why don't more coaches follow Jerry Sloan's lead and implement mandatory postgame workouts for all players who don't play 20 minutes per game. Imagine the sudden improvement in Michael Olowokandi's game.
Somewhere, Wilt Chamberlain is chuckling at the prospect of regaining the NBA's all-time single scoring average lead should Michael Jordan average less than 20 points per game this season.
With rap lyrics now being used as learning tools in Los Angeles' classrooms, does that mean Shaquille O'Neal can scrap plans on becoming a sheriff and aim to be a teacher when he retires?
I see that Madonna has banned TV from her home. I wonder if the idea came after watching one too many Cavaliers games on NBA League Pass.
For all you mathematicians out there, which is larger: the Great Wall of China or the NBA Rookie Wall?
After THIS week, I don't know what I need more: an anti-virul screener on my laptop, peace on earth/goodwill toward man or an ice bag for my head.
Bill Walton, who is an NBA analyst for ESPN, is a regular contributor to ESPN.com.
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