MEMPHIS -- Hubie Brown returns to the NBA sidelines tonight as the 0-8 Memphis Grizzlies face the T-Wolves at the Pyramid. After a 15-year coaching layoff -- he last guided the Knicks to a 24-58 record 1987 -- Brown appears eager to turn the struggling club around.

	Hubie plans to blind opposing teams with coaching science.

"There's been a lot of talk about the Grizzlies playing, like, totally uninspired ball," said Brown, sporting a brand new high-top fade haircut, "but I don't think it's anything that a little pre-game Duran Duran can't fix."

Brown indicated that the team's lackluster defense would be the first thing addressed at tomorrow's practice. "104 points a game is just grody to the max," quipped the new skipper. "Like gag me with a spoon."

When asked if he thought the team had enough young talent to build around, Brown was emphatic in his response. "Word to your mother, Holmes. Pau Gasol and Drew Gooden are two of the dopest young dudes in the league. Combine them with a tubular point guard like Jason Williams, and I see no reason why we shouldn't have a rad record from here on out."

Brown also fielded numerous questions about the Grizzlies' alleged lack of chemistry. "I'm, like, totally psyched for some team bonding," said Brown. "That's why I'm having everybody over my place tomorrow night to watch Miami Vice."

With defense, youth, and chemistry, Brown is all but guaranteeing that Memphis' streak of eight straight losses to start the season is a thing of the past. "If we lose Friday night against Minnesota, I'll cut all my skinny black leather ties in half."